Tuesday, December 7, 2010

What is so Hard at Being Single?

Being happy with yourself is not easy when you're almost thirty yet still don't have a relationship since birth.  You feel a pang when you see your classmates and friends marrying off the girl of their dreams.  You feel jealous when the crush you chatted for weeks suddenly refused to talk to you only to find out that she already had a boyfriend.

Life is not fair, but the worst thing you could ever do is to be unfair to yourself. To bitterly curse your loneliness is normal. But in doing so, you forget that you are NOT lonely at all! Otherwise, how do you train in Jiu-jitsu all by yourself?  Certainly you have your team mates rolling with you, friends to go out with, and you still have your family with you. You are only missing one person in your life, not a team, not a brotherhood, not your family.  You are not lonely. 

I'm not saying that you should not find a woman. But never ever think that you will be truly happy only when you get a girlfriend and a wife. Having a relationship will always have tumultuous moments which even extend up to marriage. Mr. W a brown-belt I've befriended in Facebook, said that in marriage a man would get less and less sex over time. And funny, men would STILL go out with their buddies for a good time after they get married.  You can be happy just the way you are. 

I think when a person is truly happy with himself, he'd be able to make sound and intelligent decisions in choosing a woman. And vice-versa.  You'd have no qualms dumping a gold digger no matter how pretty she is, nor will you concede to her emotional blackmail.  You master your emotions, not being a slave to it.           In my theology class, our lecturer delivered the best advice on marriage: "You marry not because you can't live without her; You CAN live without her, yet you CHOSE to be with her.  That is True Love."

No comments:

Post a Comment